Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Birth Story continued... "Week One"



Surgery

They brought me into the surgery room and were surprised when I could lift my hips up to move over onto the surgery table. It wasn’t like the epidural was working at 100%. I could still feel the contractions. They were pretty bad the last hour. I’m not sure any of the doctors/nurses believed me because they kept talking to me during the contractions when I stopped everything and focused on breathing. I kept having to ask them to repeat what they said due to me not hearing them. Once I was on the right table they stretched my arms out next to me. I guess they strapped them down, but I didn’t think they did at the time. There was a sheet in between me and my stomach, but I could see over it at a mirror which showed all.
They marked the area to be cut and took sharp pinchers to my belly just to make sure I couldn’t feel anything. By that time the medicine finally had kicked in, thankfully. Next, they cut me, but Joseph still wasn’t there. I was beginning to wonder if he’d ever show up. I guess they kept him outside of the room until after the cut, but I got to see it  They took two instruments and spread my belly open and stuck approximately nine towels in my belly. Then they proceeded to get the baby. They pulled out his head. Wow! He did have a full head of hair. That was the last thing I saw. The doctor bent over me to pull out the rest of the baby, so he was in between the mirror and me  Thankfully, Joseph took pictures. The doctor pulled the baby out and said, “Do you see what you have?” I said, “No, I can’t see anything ” Next thing I know Joseph exclaims, “He’s well hung!” Then I said, “Oh, it’s a boy.”

The curtain was lifted so I couldn’t see the rest of the procedure  I couldn’t see anything for a while. I could, however, hear them counting and recounting. I assumed it was the towels they stuffed in me that they were counting. Then they brought the baby over to me. Ah! He was beautiful. They took a picture then out dad went with the baby. I was informed I wouldn’t be able to see the baby for two hours. Believe it or not, those hours passed quickly. The last thing I remember before they brought my baby to me was them lifting me off the surgery table and onto the rolling table.

Hospital Stay

After two short hours, (I think I fell asleep) they brought my baby to me. The first thing he does is hold up his head. My response is, “You brought me a month old.” He was born 8 lbs 11 oz and was 21 ½ inches long and holding lifting his head. He had to be a month old.

The first night/day, Tuesday night & Wednesday, Betsy stayed with me. She made me sleep and told people to come visit the next day. Joseph took over that Wednesday evening. Thursday, there were many visitors. My mom came to stay with me and JT that afternoon. He did have a slight fever Thursday night; however, that was remedied by only wrapping him in one blanket instead of two. JT had been losing weight but it was still within the parameters the hospital had set. Joseph stayed with us Friday evening. Then my mother returned Saturday, so Joseph could go to his gig.

Saturday afternoon, JT had another fever, was down to 7 lbs 9 oz, and was dehydrated. I had been feeding him on demand, but that wasn’t good enough. JT was soon brought to NICU and I was released from the hospital, but they let me stay in the room (nesting room) through Monday. JT’s fever went down quickly, but his temperature soon dropped below what’s acceptable. He was put under a heating lamp by the next day. He was given an IV of sugar water or something like that soon after going to NICU. That made him full and not desire to breastfeed. They had to keep feeding him, so he was given formula. He got his milk faster and had to latch differently than he did to my breast. Breastfeeding became torture those few days and for a day after we were released. JT was released Monday evening. The nurses and everyone were great. I would have lost it had it not been for the amazing help I had from friends, family, and hospital staff.



Post Partum Depression

The first week after the baby was born was the most difficult for me to handle. I had wanted to have a natural birth without an episiotomy. That was out the window and then breastfeeding seemed to be floating away too. All of that made me think I was a bad mom. I kept telling my husband that. He was so good to me and comforting. Not only were all of my plans messed up but so was my body. The c-section really did a number on my body. I was in pain, but worse than that I was massively bloated from my waist down. My left knee was so bad it looked like a large grapefruit. When I had to take a shower after getting rid of the catheter, I looked in the mirror and began to sob. Joseph quickly came in thinking something horrible had just happened. As I fell into his arms bawling, I said, “My body is so ugly!” He softly laughed and told me I had too high of a standard and that if a bunch of nurses were in here naked I would see that.

The Tuesday after we arrived home from the hospital, I was up before everyone and crying like a little baby. I hated how I felt and what was happening to me, but I didn’t know what to do. My house was in shambles still, my baby had to be watched closely to prevent any further trips to the hospital, my nipples were in pain as was my stomach, and I felt like I couldn’t do anything right. After bawling for quite some time, I told myself to think of just one thing to do, stop there, and do it. I did it. Then I told myself to think of one more thing and do it. I did it. By the time the baby had woken up, I was pretty much myself again. I took everything one step at a time for the next couple days. The depression stayed gone 

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